Doggy Style

One day I was sitting on the couch feeding the baby, when Ariana wanted me to do something (don't remember what)

Me: It's going to have to wait a little bit, I'm in the middle of feeding the baby so I can't right now.

Ariana: *discouraged look that suddenly turns into that of a lightbulb going on over her head*  When Zara wants to be all done feeding her puppies, she just stands up and let's them drop on the floor. 

Me: That's not how I do it.

She is going to make a wonderful mother some day... with very long nipples and brain-damaged babies... 

Zara with her puppies

How To Mess Up Your Children: Chapter 1

Ariana: Mommy was I a mistake?

Me: No, you weren't.

Ariana: So all the bad things that happened to me were supposed to happen?

Me: What kind of bad things do you think happened to you?

Ariana: Getting stung by a wasp.

Jonathan: That kind of thing happens to everyone.

Noah: Well I've never been stung...

Me: That's because you were a mistake.

Questionable Days Off

Yesterday the school nurse called me and said Noah was in her office. He didn't have a fever, but was complaining of a stomachache and had a cough. She said he was practically in tears, and she hadn't seen him like that before; he really wanted to go home.

So I left work and picked him up. He laid on the couch watching dvd's and perked up. By bedtime he was back to walking around armed with a bucket (just in case) and too tired to move.

This morning he didn't think he was "up for" going to school. Fine. One more day.

Of course once Ariana was out the door he was bouncing around and making me doubt his illness. So I decided to drag him into work with me for a few hours, and we came home in time to get his sister from school.

Another mom waiting at the school asked if we were going to stay and play, but I told her how Noah had been playing hookey so staying wasn't an option, since he was "sick".

When Jonathan came home from work Noah practically flew at him over the couch.

Noah: "Hi! You're home!" *bounce*bounce*
Jon: "Oh, you're real sick."
Noah: "I'm a hooker! .... wait, that wasn't what you said earlier, was it?"
Me: "Hookey."